Now Trending: Not-Married Moms!

A very common question pregnant women who aren't married hear is, "When are you getting married?". Right after the ever so popular "What are you having!?!" ...... An alien. I'm having an alien and I am getting married tomorrow so you can stop asking that question.

If you love, or even like the pregnant woman in your life, just don't ask her that first question. Please. Yes, you may think it in your head, but keep it there. We are all sick of hearing it. We will get married in our own time, we when want to.

I know more not-married moms than married ones (I hate the word single, because it portrays the idea that Mom is alone and some of us aren't). We got a wonderful surprise and decided that getting married during this time was not what we wanted. Why would we rush getting married? I want to have time to plan a wonderful wedding and be able to fully enjoy it (So sue me, I want to be able to drink at my wedding)! I want to have E at a point where she has weaned (on her own time) and Casey and I are comfortable enough to be away from her. She is my main concern, not myself.

At the end of the day E has a Mommy and Daddy who love her very much and she has no idea we aren't married.

This is for all the Mommy's out there who have heard that dreaded question!

I give you permission to slap the next person who asks you this question........I mean.....uh.....never mind, do what you feel.

My #1 Pregnancy Necessity

Our Doula!

"What is a Doula?", you may ask. My description of a Doula is as follows: "An amazing woman who provides support and strives to be a Mother, Sister, and Friend to a woman during her Pregnancy."

Other descriptions I have found sound more like this:

"The word "doula" comes from the ancient Greek meaning "a woman who serves" and is now used to refer to a trained and experienced professional who provides continuous physical, emotional and informational support to the mother before, during and just after birth; or who provides emotional and practical support during the postpartum period." (http://www.dona.org/mothers/)

Hiring a Doula was an easy decision for Casey (Daddy) and I. We live about 12 hours from the majority of our family. In combination with moving frequently, and this being our first pregnancy, we knew we could benefit from the extra support we would receive from a Doula.

If we were surrounded by family during this time, we might not have hired a Doula, but I can't say for sure. Doulas do usually come with a price tag. Unless, you are able to find a Doula who is still training to become certified by an organization such as DONA International or a Doula who is linked through your hospital or birth center, those Doulas might come to you at little or no cost. The average cost of a Doula is between $200-$400. The more experience a Doula has will be reflected in the price they charge. 

Birth Doulas (which is what we have) often schedule a few meetings before the birth of your baby to discuss your birth plan and you and your partner's fears, hopes, and anything else you would like to discuss. 

Postpartum Doula; a Doula who is there for you, your partner, and baby, to help with baby blues, breastfeeding, and any questions you may have. Our Doula will be visiting us after baby is born, which is why we don't feel the need for a Postpartum Doula. You can certainly have both or one and not the other, it's completely up to you! 

If you have interest in finding a Doula, ask your Doctor or Midwife, or you can search online yourself! You can do a search in your area on the DONA International website.

Currently Reading: "The Womanly Art of Breastfeeding" by La Leche League International & "Dave Ramsey's Complete Guide to Money" by Dave Ramsey & "French Kids Eat Everything" by Karen Le Billon